Being a single mom of 3 boys, I rarely get a chance to have one on one with any of the boys. Since we moved J has been having a really hard time adjusting. He’s had anger outbursts, been really sensitive, can not handle any teasing, complains that no one likes him. It’s been really rough, especially since this has always been my easy, laid back child. He was kicked out of the after school program at the child care center I work for because he threw a chair. So now, he and his twin brother are in two separate after school programs.
Fortunately, I get off work at 3 pm although I usually stay until 3:45 when it’s time to get Monkey C. off the bus. I decided to take Monkey J for some Mommy time. When I picked him up from after school, I told him what we were doing. He thought it was because he doesn’t snuggle me very often. I said “well really it’s because you’ve been having a really hard time since we moved and I thought it might helped if we spent some time together.” He said “yeah, that would be good. We immediately started in on a conversation about why he’s having a hard time. He immediately said that he thinks it’s because he’s not used to living here (our new home). I told him I agreed. We talked about how he’s struggled socially. At his old school he was one of the popular kids. He had lots of friends. This year he has one good friend and one kind of friend. He says a lot of kids are mean to him. He’s not used to dealing with bullying. We started to talk about better ways to deal with it but he got upset so we just moved on to having fun at the park.
We played on the playground a bit and then went for a short nature walk through mange groves to the inter-coastal water way. We just enjoyed observing the nature around us such as hermit crabs, jumping fish, birds, etc. It was a really nice relaxing time. I was so pleased with the time we had together. I really saw the value of insuring I spend one on one time with each of the boys. The twins have never really had time alone with me and Monkey C hasn’t since he was 3 yrs old. This is now one of my top priorities!
